Holding Inanna’s hand – embracing menopause

Posted on Jul 19, 2016 in Healing, Spiritual living

Embracing menopauseI’ve been consistent in writing articles for my blog and recording videos for a few years now, but just recently you may have noticed that I haven’t been so active recently (or maybe that’s just my social media ego hoping)! After a couple of false starts where the words simply weren’t flowing, or I felt I really didn’t have anything worthwhile to share, I decided to leave it for a while.

At first I attributed this disturbance in my usual creative routine to being thrown by the sudden cancellation of our house sale, closely followed by the shocking result of the EU referendum. Then, as I probed more deeply into what was truly happening beneath my obvious human reactions to these admittedly influential events, I finally understood that my soul is expressing its desire to honour a major rite of passage in my life. I am in the menopause!

How could you have missed that, I hear you say? Well I’m a very active, young at heart woman who is blessed with excellent physical health so I wasn’t noticing much of a difference in that department – or so I thought at first. With hindsight, I can see now that my moon bleeding has not been as regular or predictable as it usually is over the last 12 months or so, and that my sensitivity in the days before it kicks in is far greater. Generally, though, I feel extremely well with none of the physical symptoms that others have told me can cause so much distress at this time.

What I have been noticing clearly, which at first I didn’t associate with menopause at all, is that there are certain things I have done or participated in quite happily which my energy field can now not tolerate for long, or indeed at all. I’ve been fairly and happily active on Facebook in a number of groups, but now my energy levels dip noticeably when I spend too long in front of the computer screen and it can even make me feel disoriented, so I’ve been less and less present online. At the same time, I’m experiencing a kind of restless, suffocating dissatisfaction (I’m not sure that describes it accurately enough but it will have to do for now) which is only completely stilled when I’m working with my clients, or when I’m outside, surrounded by nature. And it has to be totally out in nature – the garden doesn’t cut it as we have houses either side and a road in front of us. I mean out where I’m surrounded by trees, green and water with few signs of modern life to break the flow of energy, with my bare feet touching the earth if the Welsh weather allows. At these times, in these places, I feel I’m fully grounded and present in “me” again.

Which leads me on to the really BIG challenge of this menopausal process, especially for one who has done so much deep inner work already and for whom this confession could so easily be interpreted as an admission of failure by my inner critic. It feels as if I’m no longer exactly certain of who I am, and that I’m having to revisit everything I thought I was or wanted to do and be. My normal routines don’t fulfil me as they once did, and I’m being drawn to gift myself with more time to look within, to access new ways of being that can honour this menopausal journey. Space is the key; space and the welcoming of emptiness which dissolves boundaries and allows transformation to occur. Space is the necessary bridge between the death of the old and the birth of the new.

As I’m sure we all know, space, emptiness, and the void is not the most comfortable realm to BE in as a modern human. If anything, we’re taught it’s selfish, lazy, and unproductive when there is always so much to DO. I’m aware how fortunate I am that as a self-employed woman, I have total control over where and how I spend my precious time. So this need to create a new schedule for myself is not an issue.

Where I have to trust, to really surrender, is that in saying yes to letting go of the structures that have held my outer identity in place so far, I am not losing myself but gaining a greater awareness of the full extent of my I Am presence and how I want to express that in the world. By acknowledging and accepting where I’m at, I can integrate all that this experience has to offer me. I know that by descending into the Underworld willingly the journey will be much easier, and that when I ascend again (as I undoubtedly shall) I will be changed. Not less but more – more authentic, more powerful, more knowing, more compassionate, more present.

“We travel through the dark of the moon whenever…we face the loss of that form which has given our life a structure and sense of identity…What has been is no longer, and what is to come has not yet appeared.” – Demetra George

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Semele Xerri

© Semele Xerri is a psychic intuitive guide, healer, animal communicator, and Reiki Master Teacher. To find out more about her and her services, go to her Work with me page.

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